Welcome to Day 1/Part 2 of my mini series on my SF adventure with Paul. I had a truly eye-opening experience, and that is why I decided to break this into a few parts.
And the Conclusion/Part 4 is right here.
Alright let’s get into it!
Place #1: Farm : Table
I’ve come here before, and it really didn’t give me anxiety. It’s a big piece of toast with homemade mascarpone cheese, and a bunch of fresh fruit topped with crushed pistachios. The ED voice in me was saying the mascarpone and pistachios were too fattening and too calorie-dense, but I realize this is quite ridiculous. When these quick voices come up, I’ve learned to push it out by listing the benefits of each fear food. I can do this pretty well now, but at the beginning of recovery, it definitely took a lot more time to convince myself and be okay. There are hardly any pistachios on it, plus not to mention all the health benefits that come with it. And the mascarpone is ridiculously delicious, and there was a perfect amount. Place #1 down and conquered.
Place #2: Roam Artisan Burgers
My burger is on the bottom, but I am just incredibly proud of this shot, so I decided to include this picture! Every time I look at this picture, I have to be quite honest, I die because this place was so. Freaking. Good!
When I was deep into my ED, pictures like this would downright disgust me because I could never imagine myself eating it. All I saw was fat and grease and slob. Now that I’m mentally a lot more healthy, and I can think straight, I just want this burger in my hands again right now. Nothing in this burger gave me anxiety except for the cheese. Cheese is still a fear food for me, but I am trying to work on that. When I first started going on food adventures though, an egg in a burger really made me nervous. A patty and an egg just seemed like too much to handle. ED made me believe you could only have 1. I’ve conquered that fear, so now it’s only the cheese that gets to me.
In all honesty, society puts such a bad stigma on burgers, but I don’t see the “bad” in them anymore. Take my burger for example. It has a healthy dose of carbs from the bun. A turkey patty has lots of protein. An egg has healthy fats and also some protein. Then there are the veggies (I don’t think I have to explain that). And lastly, cheese for calcium. And sweet chili sauce for taste, plus I’m sure there are some nutrients in there because of the chili. See? Nothing is “bad” for you. No food is “bad.” They all serve a purpose.
Place #3: Tacolicious
Okay, not gonna lie, but this place gave me a tad bit of anxiety. The fact that there are 2 tortillas, the authentic way I should mention, gave me the most anxiety because my ED said that there was no point in having 2 tortillas when I could taste the food just fine with 1 tortilla. I ordered 4 and Paul ordered 4 as well.
These were my 4! I had 2 chicken ones, 1 fish one, and 1 butternut squash/leek/pumpkin seed/fontina cheese one. I ate the last 2, all doubled-up tortillas and all, and then I had a bite of the other 2 because I was actually getting pretty full. When I started eating, it wasn’t as hard as I anticipated. They were super good tacos too!
Sometimes when I’m super anxious about a food, I don’t taste the goodness of it because the ED is so loud. I think I could have enjoyed these tacos just a little bit more due to the slight anxiety that I was experiencing, but they were still delicious. I ate some chips too, which I wasn’t “planning” on eating, but they sounded so good with salsa!
We were going to go get ice cream, but the place we went to was closed due to the rain unfortunately. It was raining so hard and getting kind of late, so we ended up not going out for dessert, but we did snack back at the hotel. That was the end of day 1!